Preconceived assumptions

I find assumptions to be one of the invisible barriers we have all experienced. A barrier that we set based on experience, trauma, prejudice, or merely having expectations or hopes for things to occur repeatedly. This idea of assuming things to turn out the way they do, or for people to continue reacting in a certain manner, limits us to thinking outside the box. It is this conception of building a block around yourself, restricting opportunities and experiences, and interactions and anecdotes for the simple reason that we assume things will turn out a certain way. This idea may come about what others believe or see things as, which can be detrimental to one’s perspective of life because it leads you to fit into a norm and follow other people’s footsteps; comparing and having biases. 

Recently, I came across a handful of people having assumptions of who I was, or what I thought, which limited questions to be asked and openness in continuing a conversation. It saddened me to think that because of an assumption, there would be a limitation that would fork a relationship or friendship in two different directions because of skipping the step of simply asking a question. But I have also been caught up in this pattern of assumption: where we prefer not to ask, jump to conclusions and not get the full story, because it saves us the burden of thinking that we would be carrying the weight that would come with having this information. Regardless of being in such a pattern, we also come to find ourselves getting to a point where we simply stop being curious or thinking about how things could be different and the endless possibilities that might transpire until after a situation occurs; it is only then that we begin to question every aspect of what went wrong? Or what could I have done differently? Maybe, assumptions are simply a gateway to discovering where or how it is that one jumps to conclusions, because it may be something that we have become habituated with that has brought us comfort (in the short run) even if it makes us uncomfortable (in the long run). 

When we start to ask the questions, become unfiltered and remove the mask of preconceived notions of how things seem and not how they are, we may begin gaining more clarity and a clearer sense of our reality. But for one to do this, it also means removing the assumptions of the actions we think we should take that do or do not align with who we are. We have to start asking if what we are doing is for us, or others; taking a step back to assess our perspectives of life and where they are rooted from. Now, I don’t mean to go into a rabbit hole and stay stuck in discovering every aspect of your past, because if not you will not be present nor looking towards your potential and possibilities. However, I think it is uncovering the patterns we can sometimes be drawn to, and how we jump to conclusions and skip to simply making assumptions instead. So, I ask you: What are the roots of assumptions you have in different aspects of your life?

Z.