Relationships change as you do

Friendships and relationships are one of the most sacred and best guides in growth and self-discovery. The people that come and go in your life are teachers, mentors, and challengers, with the memories one creates and experiences one goes through. I find that relationships are a guide to growth, they are a test to understanding who you are and the person you are becoming, as well as the triggers that you have not wanted to face. We form bonds with people with whom we resonate in values, interests and things we experienced together. However, there are parts of relationships that we put on the side until they come to an end, things that we do not necessarily realize. 

In the past few months, I have grown apart from people, connected with others and reconnected with people from my past. I found that the thing we separate when we are bound to someone - let that be a friendship or relationship - is the idea of change and growth. It is not until we sometimes create distance with someone that we see how we resonate or don’t with the person we have been connecting with for some time. There are some people with whom we will continuously grow, regardless of the distance and they are the constants in our life (no matter the time apart, or the distance that separates both); there are other people with whom we share chapters of our life where we are somehow connected with to grow or discover a part of ourselves that we had not yet uncovered. But that is beautiful, to be able to encounter people in our life that we create memories with, grow and become more of who we are, or even distance ourselves from who we are to then have an opportunity to reconnect with ourselves. 

I think that we bank on the idea of wanting to change and grow with someone by our side, to know that we are not alone. It is not because we necessarily fear being alone, but we want to have someone who will keep us on track. Unfortunately and fortunately, we can have that person by our side, but the process and journey we go through is ours and no one else’s. The people around us will help us discover the values we base our foundation on, and will also shift perspectives that we thought we were rooted in. However, the relationships we create, even if part of us, are separate. And I think that knowing that the people in our life are gifts and guides, we cherish the coming and going of people we encounter, without limiting the idea of needing to depend on someone else to be the guide to our growth and discovery.

Z.