Reprogram your computer

If there is one thing I have come to learn in the past couple of weeks, it is the importance of having clear values by which one lives. Many hold the belief—or better said, hope—that people share the same values; yet, there may be differences in various ways. It may not be the terminology of the value, but the meaning behind it. I think that is the trajectory I am on right now.

Regardless of being in a position where you have a set of values, understanding what they mean (to you) is crucial, and that is where your journey of self-discovery and understanding truly comes into play. It involves stepping back from what others say and giving yourself a chance to relearn or redefine those meanings; on a broader scale, perhaps redefining the meaning of your life. The key lies in perspective and understanding, or at least the willingness to embrace them. But how does one embark on this journey? How does one begin to find their own meaning amidst so much external influence? How do you silence the noise and tune in to your inner voice? What steps can we take to connect more with our authentic selves rather than who we’ve allowed others to define us as?

For me, I can say that unlearning beliefs or the ideas that have shaped our identity is one of the most confusing things ever. You may find yourself questioning your entire identity and even feel a sense of separation from who you are, leaving you lost. However, the idea of compassion offers a way to explore and find yourself without losing hope. Now, as I have come to define it, compassion is not only the act of giving love but also the act of receiving it. Self-compassion is where we truly give ourselves a chance to discover who we are without judgment. We begin to introduce curiosity into our lives, allowing ourselves to open our eyes to different possibilities and opportunities. Yet, even this can be challenging, as we have learned certain patterns or cycles when processing experiences. It takes active awareness to integrate compassion and to transform or unlearn beliefs. This process may be draining and daunting, as you might feel burdened or hindered from progressing in your growth due to lingering memories and instilled beliefs.

I have come to see it like a computer. We know the analogy of people’s brains resembling computers that process information. We can use our minds like machines to process emotions. It involves separating ourselves from our thoughts and emotions to simply see things as they are, rather than continuously trying to rationalize the irrational or process what should simply be. But how do we start to create this separation? It is a conscious choice you have to make now that you recognize you can control your emotions and thoughts. As I wrote in my previous article, it is not about the first step you take, but rather the second one. It is not the immediate reaction (which is instinctive), but the response to that reflexive reaction. When you view it this way, it becomes like a game, as you challenge yourself against a machine (i.e., your mind’s computer program).

So, perhaps it is time to take control of your life by redefining the concepts and terminology that define you. Maybe it is time to reprogram your computer and offer a new perspective not only on concepts but on yourself as well. Start by asking: Where does this come from?

Z,